Hit or Miss

In which Matt decides to take a break. I haven’t been in the best of spirits lately.

My running schedule has been thrown off due to weather and social engagements (not as glamorous as it sounds) and I haven’t been out jogging in almost a week. Thus, I’m feeling kind of sluggish – I guess I’m missing those endorphins I’ve gotten used getting to when I go running.

I’m pretty lonely. There are a lot of nice people around and my coworkers are friendly, but I just haven’t made any close friends yet — someone I can open up to and have a meaningful conversation with yet. I just feel like the odd person out.

I haven’t been outside of Kirksville since I moved here 2 months ago. I’m feeling little stiffled in this town.

I’m trying to decide if I want to shut off anyone from the truman.edu domain from looking at my weblog. As a hall director, I feel like I’m in a fishbowl (and the students aren’t even here yet). I didn’t mind it at IU since it was such a big place, but now I’m feeling pressure (provided only by myself) to not write about my personal life and my interactions with people I’ve met here.

I feel like I’m at a creative impasse. I’ve been trying out redesigns of hit-or-miss.org for two or three weeks and haven’t liked a single one. I’ve also been trying to come up with a design for my hall’s webpage and again haven’t been able to produce any satisfactory results.

I’m also having trouble finding things to write about on my weblog — a) I find myself getting too far removed from primary news sources as I only have time to read the news filtered through other blogs, and b) after I got that stupid Cool Stop of the Day award, I feel like I can’t live up to expectations that my blog be “interesting” or “humourous” or “cool.”

To top off my spell of gloom, the constuction workers stole the marker from my dry erase board, my watch broke, and the guy hasn’t called me back.

For all these reasons, I think I need to take a little vacation. Away from the web. No blogging and no reading other people’s blogs.

If I’m feeling so lonely, why am I cutting myself off from the one circle of friends I still have (i.e. the blog community)? I think I just need some cathartic alone / sulking time. Maybe a week. As long as it takes for me to want to start blogging again.

2 responses so far (Respond)

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Enjoy the respite.

Maybe you’ll get in some road time, or read a good book. What ever it is, I hope you’re successful…

Looking forward to a happy, healthy return.

vis10n

Vis10n | 21 Jul 2000
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I’ll miss you, Matt!

Firda | 22 Jul 2000