Hit or Miss

Only time will tell…

I hate to say it, but I think moving to New York was a mistake. You never know how you’ll match up with a job until you try it, and quite frankly I’m proving pretty incapable so far. And I’m pretty sure I’m not enjoying what I’m doing. I have no clue how to make any friends — not that I have any free time to do so. Additionally I’m too much of cheapskate to go do anything fun, or even buy groceries (resulting in a few weeks of eating only peanut butter sandwiches).

I know I’m probably just cranky because it’s the night before student check-in and there’s a million things not finished and I’ll be facing a horde of angry parents tomorrow. I’m trying not to think too much about the job I turned down in Wisconsin that would have paid more and given me a nicer place to live with a meal plan, free laundry, and a reserved parking spot right outside my dorm.

If I can make it past this weekend, maybe New York will prove me wrong.

6 responses so far (Respond)

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Hey Matt… you’ve only just arrived. Give NY a chance: once the students are in, and there are people around that you have an immediate commonality with, you’ll make some good friends.

When things slow down a bit, start looking around for volunteer opportunities… it’s a big city, and you could make a difference — all while meeting new people!

And good luck with check-in tomorrow!

– sG

Silus Grok | 23 Aug 2003
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Matt, for what it’s worth, I tell people to expect to spend months 2-4 in NYC questioning the choice to be here and feeling a bit overwhelmed. It’s a *huge* change. But rest assured, you’re waaay to early into this thing to know whether it’s a good or bad choice. Wait until you get the swing of things and you’re a bit more comfortable before you draw any conclusions.

For most of the first year I was here, I really understood what someone had once told me about moving to NYC: That eventually you always end up curled in a ball on the floor of your bedroom or bathroom, bawling your eyes out and wondering how you were ever going to make it. It’s a tough trial by fire, but it’s nothing compared to, say, coming out. And like any difficult process, it’s well worth the effort.

Hang in there, feel free to give me a call or shoot me an email if you ever start to lose faith, and rest assured, even those of us who *love* this city and would never want to be anywhere else spent some time feeling like you do now.

Anil | 23 Aug 2003
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it seems like such an absurd choice — New York or parking — but I really, really know what you mean. Speaking as one who has live in Missouri and in New York (as well as Puerto Rico, Boston, et al) I think the true dilemma is that one can never be happy in one place when one has known the conveniences, inconveniences, pleasures and deprivations of another.

And, to some extent, the same is true for changing jobs. and men.

but mostly, matt, I want to smack you. you’re in New York City. for the love of all that’s holy, go to a museum, have a drink at a gay piano bar, give my best to mike, and count your blessings.

david | 23 Aug 2003
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I have been reading your blog for a little under a year, and you have always seemed so straight forward and to the point, I never imagined you being “scared” of NY, thought it was the perfect place for you. I am jealous of what you have, and the opportunity you have to tell everyone about it. We could always trade, you come here to boring ol’ London Ontario Canada, and I move to NY 🙂 Good luck Matt, you’ll make it!

JennyAnn | 23 Aug 2003
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Hey Matt,

I’m a small-town Missouri boy who lived two years in NYC and now seven (can it possibly be that long?) in D.C. Don’t give up on Gotham just yet. I bet you’ll be nearly a native by Halloween. Speaking of Halloween, New York is a very fun place to spend Halloween.

Mike | 25 Aug 2003
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Matt,
When I moved here 30 months ago, I wanted to pack up everything, call myself a failure and leave town every 2-3 weeks. Now that feeling hits every 9-12 months. Give it time. You have yet to have one of those “damn, how could I ever leave this city” moments. When you do, you’ll be able to look back on those times and remember exactly why you moved here in the first place. Hang in there.

Aaron | 26 Aug 2003